Tag Archives: truth

Trippin on a Tuesday

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I seem to always ask myself in moments of sheer clarity, “Who am I” and try to conjure up as many identities as I could.
Woman. Millennial. Muslim. Pakistani. Punjabi. Feminist.
At the top of my head these are some of the identities that I use for myself. Sort of like ribbons i’ve wrapped around my existence.

I ask myself again, Who am I?
The voice replies “nothing”.
It’s like the different ribbons wrapped so tightly around my existence are there in place to hide the fact that I am nothing. It is a dead end oblivion but not particularly the negative one that we attribute to the nihilistic concept of living.

But i’ve learnt with time and of age to undo every ribbon around my existence and unveil a cosmic cluster of nothingness that will slowly dissipate into the void that it belongs to.
A kaleidoscope pattern from the spill of cosmic cluster. The ribbons have come off. I know who I am.
I ask myself again, who are you?
“Nothing and everything”, this time I make a note to say it out loud.

(Acid diaries)

Odd human beings

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It is odd
How we claim to love the dark
But seek light in our lives

It is odd
How we admit karma exists
But still do wrong

It is odd
How we say that we love one another
But end up killing our own brothers

It is odd
How we end up wanting the truth
But turn a blinds eye towards it

It is odd
How we claim to be a lost soul
But never try finding ourselves

It is odd
How we are a contradiction
Of right thoughts and wrong actions

Dedicated to him.

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Concealed his past behind cigarette smoke
You might see him on the sidewalk beneath the lamp post

Worn out jeans and days since he shaved
He wears his heart out on his sleeves

He used to worry about the future
Till the universe told him there exists none

He is a poet
Who never inked words on parchment

He is a lover
Who only tasted unrequited love on his lips

He is a searcher
Whose God denounced his existence on the altar

He is a prophet on a mission to preach
His words contradict truth and fiction

Behind his crooked smile and hash infused palms
Lies a gambler who traded tomorrow for today

Behind his worn out existence and courage to survive
Lies a soul who found life in narrow doors and dark bars

Pretty&Broken-1

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The truth is I’m frightened. Everyone is in life. However, I’m a bit more terrified at the thought of being vulnerable. I like to write prose and poems on love and life.

“Be free, wild hearts!”, I say, “Fall in love and kiss in the rain.”

 

The truth is that I’m a hypocrite. I’m the biggest hypocrite, I know and I know plenty.

I don’t allow myself the love that I preach to the world.

I’m a coward. I look for shelter in the rain. I don’t dance in it.

I pen down love and life. I spill poetry like vodka and intoxicate hearts.

I’m terrific at making people fall in love with me.

Not the constant.

 

 

I will write you love poems and tell you to give your heart away. The truth is that when it comes to myself, all I have is an out of tune heart beat and some lies to give.

The process of unlearning

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I never thought I would meet someone like you. Someone who will teach me to love again. Honest to God, I wasn’t much of a believer in miracles. I didn’t believe someone could revive the love in my soul like you did.
You did. I spent hours and days learning you. You were a new book, I had to read but the truth was even when I was done with you, I started to memorize you.
Learn each and everything that you are. I wanted you to be stored in the density of my brain forever.
I claimed you mine like a selfish bitch I was, I claimed you mine from the heavens above.
It was gradual and not sudden. It was us.
I forgot that everything that gets made also breaks.
Law of nature.
Now, I lay here with a few chivas in my system and smoke in the air trying to let you go
trying to unlearn you by learning that you were never mine to begin with….were you?